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@corgnelius

Corgnelius & Stumphrey

corgnelius

2 clownass corgi clowns. ๐Ÿ“งcorgnelius@gmail.com (๐Ÿ”๐Ÿ•“ ranges from a day to a fortnight. I'll respond quicker if subject heading is: I GOT XANAX FOR U)

  • 69K Total Likes
  • 1K Tot. Comments
Sorry I don't have a pic for #nationalpuppyday. Just this pile of toys.... #ninjastompstomp #elusivesincebirth
They're such angels when they're knocked out. #puttingawaychloroform*
I don't even know wut's going on anymore. Is he practicing these poses when I'm asleep?Look at his front stumps. Fully extended (n I'm using that term generously) & BOTH not touching the floor. So obviously, ppl r gonna think, "Omg, this dog's dead. And he's been dead for so long, he's already in rigor!!" Smh. DO U KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TRYNA FLIRT W SOMEBODY WHEN U HAVE THIS CLOWN RIGHT BEHIND U?!!! DO U?!! #handsomejogger* #isurdogok?? / #hesfineignorehim #but.. #howru? #hairflip* / #noseriously #ishedead??!! / #ugh #no #buthewillbe!! / #wut? / #nothing #draggingcockblockerslowlyhome*
Current view. (Look at Stump Stump. He looks like his head and stumps melted into his body.)
(pic via reddit) Looks like he's trying to calm his drunk friend down. "Aye, bro. Just be cool. Chill out." And his drunk friend yells back, "Easy for u to say!! Ur a fckin' polar bear!!"
The calm after the storm. #bathday #mywholestudioswet
Gawd. He's so huge he makes the body pillow look like a regular-sized pillow. #theresanextracorgiinthecloset
Ugh. Would it have killed me to say, "The grass? Prob a ft high. These neighbors never mow this jungle." But nooo, I just blurt out the truth like a dumbass & hold my title as the world's worst PR Rep. (Don't tell the boys๐Ÿ™, they think I'm the best in the biz.) #weeklymeeting* #rwestillthemostfamousestdoges? / #yes!! #uronthecoverofeverymagazine!! #again! / #andourlegs... / #peoplertweetingthattheylooksosolong #dncerouslylong! / #perfect... #oksusie #youcango / #ucan.. #callmemom.. / #shutupsusie #urbeingunprofessional
"NSFW" gives u a heads up about graphic content, right? Well, we flippin' need an acronym for content LIKE THIS VIDEO!! I.e. - content that's too silly/adorable!! You've been warned.  #wutamievenwatching #acorgirace? #orratatouille? (#ThatSceneWhenTheLightsTurnOn #andtheratsscurryineverydirection)
Holy sh%t. Stumphrey tackled Corgi SO hard, he literally made his body fly thru the air like some kinda kung-fu movie. #corgifliesbackwards #landsonbambootree* #youwillpay!! #supermanpose* #fliesforward*
No green today? No worries, Pimpnelius is here to help. BUUUT...ya gotta jiggle for it. How much jigglin'? Picture a hella buff corgi waddling, full-speed, towards a pile of brie. THAT'S the acceptable jiggle level. #pplstartjiggling* / #corgithrowsdogebowl* #dontwastemytime! #ifthatsjiggling #thenimagreatfckingdane!! / #jigglingintensifies* / #no!! #feelthejiggle!! #bethejiggle!! / #jigglesresemblingseizures* / #ahhsnap!! #welllookatthat!! #itsabouttoraaain!!
Me: U better grab somethin' green, Stump Stump! It's #stpatricksday! Ur gonna get pinched!" Stumphrey: "Ohh, I know i can't wait! Soo much human contact!! And 1 of 'em will prob think I'm super cool! We'll swap numbers & ALWAYS text back right away!! Man oh man.. we're gonna get into so many shenanigans.. Gotta buy a scrapbook asap tho... u know, for all the memories we're gonna make!! THISISTOOEXCITING!!" (#smh #hesbeenheresincemidnite #withthathopefulexpression.. #theentiretime... #hehasntbeenpinchedonce..)
Yaaa, umm. I'm done w the internet for today. Bc look at this flippin' doge on stil... no. I'm done. 100% not joking- not even gonna check emails. I shall see u all tomorrow. #lookingatpiconelasttime* #smh #puttingoncoat* #walkingoutthedoor*
Was snapping a pic of Stump Stump when this juicy booty decided to waddle into the frame. #corgi #ucandosidebendsorsitups #butplzdontlosethatbutt / #pshh #uknowidontmovemom / #sniffle* #iveraiseduwellmyson #iveraiseduwell
Why would someone toss their old beanbag chair here when there's a dumpster 15 ft away?!! #lazyasspeople
For the noob followers who don't know: Corgnelius LOVES dandelions. He will legit go from dandelion to dandelion and chomp away (like a corgi version of Pac-Man). Anyways, we spotted one on our late nite walk ๐Ÿ˜€. #corgispotsdandi* #eyeswiden #rapidwaddling* #chomp*
Have a meeting today. Stepped outta the shower n saw Corgi going HAM on my last pair of flats ๐Ÿ˜•. So now my only options r: flip flops, a variety of 4 inch stiletto heels, or my Nike running shoes that I've customized w, "ROBOT EARS" written across them. Smh. Decisions, decisions.  #shakinghands* #oh #mayiaskwhyursneakerssay #robotears / #ugh #udunderstand #ifuhadrobotears // #grandmasboyreference ๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿฝ
They say doges are a reflection of their owner(s). So... looks like I'm lazy AF & ridiculously awkward. #damn #nailedit
*Sesame Street Count Dracula voice* Von! Two! Two logs!! Ah ah ah!!
Wtf is wrong me?! Is it normal to cry hella hard when u laugh?? Bc, no joke, I'm walking my boys rn & there's tears streaming down my face bc of this. BARKING SPOT!!! BARKING!!! SPOT!! Ohmygawd. My stomach. My stomach hurts so much from laughing. My eyeliner's everywhere. #puns #punsforever
"....and even w/ the assistance of a selfie stick, Corgnelius couldn't quite manage to take a good selfie." #corgidialinghotline* / #selfiesticks #howmayihelpu? / #allmypicssuck!! #ushouldchangeurproductname!! #toselfiestinks!! #slammingphonedown* #crying*

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