I just Love Christmas! 😍 JOURNAL POST #2 I’m not sure how or why I ever got into punk rock, but I know I only stayed for the culture that follows. I was addicted to the partying; the drugs, the alcohol, the mischief of the scene called my name. I loved looking as punk as I could with a shaved head, tons of patches all over my clothes and just being dirty and grungy. I don’t think I ever really liked the music; yes there are bands I still like and some songs I’ll sing to, but most of it is crap. Honestly i don’t know how I ever liked it. I trained myself to enjoy it. I looked stuff up online so I would know the answers and wouldn’t be regarded as a “poser” but I never really like the music. I hid my true self. I hated everything that wasn’t punk. I suppressed every positive feeling for anything considered girly and lame. That’s not me anymore. I haven’t partied in over 2 years. I refused pain killers after birth on my second child. I refuse to hide the true me! I have no idea why I hid it before; maybe I just wanted to be accepted somewhere and in the punk scene you can be vulgar and crazy and no one bats an eye. But this is me. THE REAL ME. I love Christmas, and Disney movies. I want to dress up like Disney princesses and wear pink and buy fancy clothes and take care of myself. I take girly Epsom salt baths and love learning about stones and healing properties. I love yoga and candles and reading romance novels (pg ones I don’t like the super porn ones haha) I love tea and hot coco. I LOVE TO SING. This is me and I will not deny it any longer. I am sober now. I am finally learning to control my thoughts and feelings and learning to love life and appreciate what I have. I want to become at peace through yoga and eventually, in a few years, I would like to become a yoga instructor and help better others lives like yoga has done for me. I’m going to keep being me and quit denying who I truly am because who I truly am is awesome. #truth
All of these lights flashing down on me giving me that attention that I need guiding me through this life that I see Showing me the way as others might say living life to the fullest seeing what it got for me seeing these lights lighting up the path for me 😎✨✌️ #losangeles#lacma#newhome#thisisme#sparkle
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